Creating a Children’s Storybook: Writing an Engaging Story
- Terence Hikawai
- Feb 6
- 9 min read
Updated: Apr 24
Background
Kia ora. Ko Terence Hikawai taku ingoa. He uri au ki Ngaati Kahungunu ki Wairoa me Ngaati Paahauwera, o Aotearoa Nu Tiirani.
Hi, my name is Terence Hikawai. I am a descendant of the Kahungunu and Paahauwera peoples, of Aotearoa New Zealand.
I have relocated to the United Kingdom with my English wife and our four-year-old daughter. We made this move to connect our daughter with her British and Irish family and heritage.
I have set a challenge for myself to write, illustrate, and publish a series of children's books that reflect different aspects of my whaanau, our whakapapa, and our tikanga. The first will be a children's picture book on how my whaanau manage and process the burial of whenua, the placenta.
My previous post covered the Planning needed before sitting down to start writing. The purpose of this post will explore my writing process for an engaging children's story.
Brainstorming Techniques
I found it was not a task to brainstorm story ideas. It was a task to see if the story fits! EVERYONE has a story or stories to tell. I have built up a decent collection over the years. The challenge for me was to decide what story I should tell first. I focused on what helped connect my daughter with her iwi, hapuu and whaanau.
Free Writing
I wrote down ideas and topics as they came to me. I would stretch and pull at them to see what came out. I even kept a dream journal to document those annoying 3am thoughts.
I drafted a ‘Moving to the UK' book series.
My Toys are Leaving, reflecting the packing, storing and shipping of our belongings.
My Trip on a Plane, reflecting the long-haul flight from NZ to the UK..
My Family in Melbourne, maintaining the connection with whaanau.
My Holiday in Dubai, reflecting on our first overseas holiday.
My First Week in England, reflecting on re-connecting with our English whaanau.
and My First Day at Preschool, reflecting on settling into life in England.
I completed rough outlines, plots, and characters. Yet, our daughter has been an absolute trooper with our move to the UK. I didn't see the need for these. But they did analyse the subtle differences between Kiwi, Maaori and English culture. Although interesting, I parked these ideas for now.
I explored the kawa and tikanga in my iwi, marae and whaanau. I landed on ‘how my whaanau manage and process the burial of whenua - placenta’. Inspired by my daughter taking part in the burying of her whenua before we travelled to the UK.
Research and Development
Both sides of my whaanau have similar kawa and tikanga. My mother’s whaanu are flexible on where they bury whenua, yet my father’s whaanau have a specific location. I recalled supporting my father to bury several of my nephew’s and nieces whenua on our whaanau farm. I decided to use this experience as the framework of my story.
My parents passed away several years ago. They held a significant amount of maatauranga. I reached out to different whaanau members to help fill in the gaps and how I would tell my story.
I read children’s picture book after children’s picture book. I revisited old favourites and found new favourites. I looked into the differences between Indigenous and Western storytelling. I researched the tight balance between text and illustration.
I discovered that I am a visual storyteller. I had several scenes and images in my head before I had any kind of text to the story. I went down a short rabbit hole and outlined a series of storybooks with no text. This proved to be a good exercise in colour theory, which I cover in the 'Creating Engaging Illustrations' post.
Character Profiles
I sat down with my daughter while she was drawing with her coloured pencils. I grabbed a piece of paper and doodled with her. I started with a simple sketch. A family portrait of an adolescent-boy, Mum, Dad, and a pre-school girl. As I drew each character, their back story came to me.
I started with the adolescent-boy who had a cheeky smile. His Mum with an easy smile. His Dad with stern eyes and a loving grin. An pre-school girl with a wide energetic smile. I had drawn the boy off to the side. I still don’t know why I did this. Was I drawing myself? or an image I had of myself?
Whatever it was, I knew the adolescent-boy was the voice needed to tell the story.
Mind Mapping
Mind Mapping helped bring some sense to the senseless. Yet it sent me spiraling back and forth. Plot lines and characters were skipping between stories. Moving from a children's book to a teen angst novel. Mind mapping didn't help my brainstorming process. Nothing against those that do it, and do it well. Everyone is different.
Storyboarding
Storyboarding helped me a lot more than mind mapping. I found it very useful for my thought process. It is a very quick and efficient way to sort through things. A more powerful method for my visual way of thinking.
I visualised key scenes I wanted in the story. A whaanau portrait, Papa Joe standing outside his whare, a panoramic view from our maunga, and the Koouka grove. I visualised secondary scenes that allowed the key scenes to exist. The hospital room, driving to Papa Joe’s whare, and driving up to the maunga. I visualised the close ups and detailed scenes. The weaving and burying of the ipu-whenua, and Papa Joe explaining tiipuna.
The most powerful part of storyboarding came when I needed to visualise how the text would sit on the page. I needed to be efficient with my words yet remain engaging.
Character Development
I knew some elements of a character profile were necessary. Yet I felt full character bios were for larger projects not a children’s book. I used Microsoft Co-Pilot. ‘Hi, can you generate a simple character bio template for a children’s storybook character? Also, produce an example character bio for Goldilocks’.
Here is the character bio for the “Adolescent-boy”:
Name: Tama
Role: Protagonist, Narrator
Age: 6-9 years old
Appearance: Brown wavy hair, solid build, average height.
Personality: Keen to learn new things, very active and energetic.
Background: the eldest child of a small Maaori whaanau.
Motivations: open to new ideas.
Relationships: strong connections to older whaanau members. Adores younger cousins. Protective of newborn sister.
Character Arc: Grows with confidence in whaanau kaupapa, kawa, and tikanaga.
I named him Tama. A name closely connected to my Hikawai tiipuna. I wanted Tama to re-tell the story to his younger sister. But after some feedback, it was best that Tama re-tell the story as it is unfolding to the reader. This would make him younger. I needed to “de-age” my writing to fit what a six to nine year old would sound like.
Using this template, and Tama’s profile, I filled in the rest of the whaanau character bio’s. Including characters not mentioned in the story. Which helped form a more complete picture.
Plot Development
Crafting engaging plots
I researched storytelling frameworks to help construct an engaging plot. The heroes journey, circular storytelling, and others. I decided to follow the ‘Heroes Journey’ storytelling format. I used Microsoft Co-Pilot. ‘Hi. generate a heroes journey template for a children’s storybook and use Goldilocks and the three bears as an example’.
I then aligned my story:
The Hero's Journey for Kids; Ipu-Whenua
The Ordinary World: a normal whaanau scene.
The Call to Adventure: the birth of a girl and Dad collecting the whenua.
Refusal of the Call: the long drive to Papa Joe’s house.
Meeting the Mentor: learning more from Papa Joe.
Crossing the Threshold: Driving to the maunga.
Tests, Allies, and Enemies: The dark forest, bumpy roads, and streams. Sandflies, sun and rain. Talking with Mum, Dad and Papa Joe.
Approach to the Inmost Cave: Reaching the summit of the maunga and heading to the oasis.
The Ordeal: true love and bravery shown to lay the ipu-whenua.
Reward: learning a valuable lesson about kawa and tikanga
The Road Back: travelling back to Papa Joe’s whare where everything seems clearer.
Resurrection: making a promise to baby sister.
Return with the Elixir: reveal that the boy is actually talking to his grandson on the maunga, like his Papa Joe.
I found that the ‘Heroes Journey’ was still too formulaic. So I simplified it even further and used the ‘Three-Acts’ format, giving me the extra wiggle room.
Act 1 - The Departure: Mum sits with Tama weaving an ipu-whenua. Later, a baby girl is born. Dad collects the whenua. Mum and baby return home. The whaanau prepare for the long drive to Papa Joe’s house. The whaanau leave. They travel through towns, across farmland, and reach Papa Joe’s whare. Tama is nervous.
Act 2 - The Initiation: The whaanau start the journey to the Kōuka oasis. Bumpy roads, shallow streams and dense forests. They reach the bottom of the maunga and begin ascending. They reach the summit. They head to the oasis.
Act 3 - The Return: They reach the oasis. The whaanau complete the ceremony. They head back up to the summit. A discussion occurs to help the Tama understand the purpose behind the tikanga. They head home. Tama makes a promise to his baby sister.
Storyboard
The rough draft needed a lot of work, so I turned back to storyboarding. I had sketched out key images, connecting images and detailed images. Yet I needed to maintain the flow of the story.
This allowed me to visualise and play between illustrations and text. I used the mode of travel to reflect the flow of the story:
Act 1: Start stationary. Travel left to right.
Act 2: Continue travelling left to right. Midway pause.
Act 3: Start travelling right to left. End with stationary.
I struggled to balance text with imagery. It was too wordy. By A LOT! I needed to further reduce the word fluffage.
I also felt that when the whaanu reached the summit of the maunga in the story that this was a natural ‘midway pause’ point. Yet, this would mean my characters would bury the ipu-whenua on top of the maunga. Which neither side of my whaanau do. I needed to rethink things. I needed to find a way to maintain the integrity of my whaanau kawa, and balance it against the storytelling.
I decided to pause this part of the process.
Writing an Engaging Story
I focused on two things; 1) Tama as my narrator and 2) the audience. I decided my audience would be non-Maaori parents of Maaori children. Which also includes, Non-Maaori teachers of Maaori students.
In many bilingual children’s storybooks, non-English words are in italics. Most New Zealand books have the meaning of Maaori words in English and (in brackets). Either one disrupts the flow of a story. I made a decision to naturalise the use of te reo Maaori in my writing. You may have noticed this is also reflected in my blog posts.
Because of this, I moved the glossary to the front, next to the mihi. Prompting the reader before they start reading the story.
Most Maaori writers have a reo Maaori and English language version within the same book. I decided against this for now, as my reo Maaori is not up to that standard. I will work with my more fluent whaanau to produce a reo Maaori version at a later date.
Editing and Revising
I read the rough storyboard to my daughter. She wasn’t engaged. She loved some elements of the story and certain images but had no real engagement. I don’t think it was the quality of the rough sketches and scribbled writing. It was because of my use of the narrative style. No child wants to 'be talked to' or 'told things'. Children want a story.I put this whole thing to the side and focused on something else.
FYI: I researched Leathercraft and attended a Leather Working Workshop. A very cool, short, and needed break.
I returned the source material ‘Papatuuaanuku and her gift of whenua’. I mentioned this puuraakau in the story yet felt it needed to be sitting at the centre. I worked on weaving this puuraakau into the story. This gave weight to the story but created challenges. The main challenge was that the narrator needed to be an elder, to carry the weight of the story.
I decided to pause this part of the process, again.
I shared with my daughter what I was doing, to find out what she liked. She loved the rhythm of Julia Donaldson's and Lynley Dodd's writing. We created a silly poem about a worm and farts. She was completely engaged and helped form very descriptive words. My subject and material is complex. Yet I feel that this style of writing might help engage children and lighten the weight of the subject. Without losing its Mana.
Conclusion
I prepared myself before starting this journey. Yet I was not prepared for the mental and emotional gymnastics. This is the beginning of my journey and I have a long way to go. I am so very thankful for the support I have.
If you are coming into this as an absolute beginner, like me, your journey is ‘trial by doing’. Sure, generative AI helped me schedule my plan. Yet it didn’t tell me I was a visual writer or that certain techniques it suggested didn’t suit my style. I had to fail and learn what worked for me and what did not. Because I am writing and illustrating, using storyboards helped. Although, if I was working with an illustrator I would still use storyboards.
However, I am at a crossroads. I have one manuscript for a picture book, and a foundation for a story book. Both serve the same purpose and have similar story beats. Yet two distinctive writing styles. I will be working on both and will review this process in future posts.
Next Post
‘Creating a Children’s Storybook: Illustrating an Engaging Story’ . The first steps in my illustrations.
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